Asserting my lack of authority

A severe lack of inspiration today has led me to share with you, gentle readers, this rough map of my personal corner of the world. This already cramped space, in which I am supposed to run my business, has just become even more crowded. Under my desk there are no fewer than 22 electrical sockets, and all but one of them is occupied by: (1) telephone desk lamp, (2) telephone answering maching (3) paper shredder (4) ring binding machine (5) office telephone (6) cable modem (7) network router (8) CRT monitor (9) PC stereo speakers (10) printer (11) scanner (12) desklamp (13) USB hub (14) Fuji S7000Z digital camera (15) desktop processor (16) table fan (17) portable radio (18) laptop (19) external CD-RW drive (20) stapler (21) battery charger. The new additions to my cramped workspace are a laptop and an external CD burner. Surely not another laptop!!! Yes, well... yes, another laptop. There is a twisted logic to this, however. Firstly, I could sense a fight looming as I broached the delicate matter to Linda of my taking the laptop with me to Portugal. Let's just say that Linda has become very fond of 'her' laptop, and doesn't want to part with it. If I have only ever learned one thing in my life, it is that Linda wears the trousers in my house - and I am man enough to admit that. So, I took the coward's way out, and said that I would buy her a desktop - it doesn't have to be fancy, since all she uses it for is word processing and internet browsing. She was reluctantly amenable, but only on the condition that any new PC had an LCD monitor. I reluctantly agreed to abandon my hopes of fobbing her off with the bargain basement lowest of low spec machines that can be had for around £300. I could tell that this was going to be difficult. I went to the computer store and had a look at what was in my budget that would be acceptable to Linda. You won't be surprised when I tell you that there was not much... but I did see a laptop with a reasonable spec for an affordable price - end of line clearance, last one in the shop. I bought it and an external CD-RW. There, I thought. This is perfect, I thought. It is smaller than the other laptop, so will take up less space on her desk, I thought. "So you'll be taking that one to Portugal with you, and you won't need mine" were her first words as I entered the house. Knowing my place, I simply replied, "Yes, dear. I suppose I will, dear. That was my intention, dear."


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